I will always love you - by Charles Roberts

                                         

                                      I will always love you

                                                 Charles Roberts

Tracy stood at the side of the open grave looking down on Rob’s coffin with tears rolling down her cheeks, the cold easterly breeze adding to the solemn occasion.  To her left stood Rob’s parents, his mother crying uncontrollably, his father standing impassively with tears running down his face.  To Tracy’s right stood her parents, her mother crying, her father with his arms round Tracy and his wife fighting to hold back the tears.

In one corner of the graveyard an order was quietly given and ten rifle shots rang out, making everyone jump slightly, one for each year Rob had been in the Army.  A Captain marched up to Tracy, halted, turned right to face her then held the neatly folded flag out to her.  She accepted the offered flag and the officer took one pace back, then smartly saluted.  He then turned to his left and marched away tears welling up for a fallen comrade, a brother in arms, a fellow officer and a very close friend.

Soon, the only ones left at the graveside were the family.  Eventually they too walked slowly away, picking their way through the gravestones to the gate and the waiting cars, which would take them to the married quarter Tracy and Rob had moved into only eight months previously.

She could still see and hear him, as he said his farewell before leaving the house with his kitbag six months ago.

“Don’t worry darling, I’ll be home before you know it and we’ll have that holiday we’ve always promised ourselves.”  He kissed her on the cheek, “look! I know that you don’t want to hear this, but if anything happens to me, I want you to find someone else.”

“Whatever made you say something like that?  Are you not coming back?”

“Of course I’m coming back darling.  I’ll always love you and take care of you.”  He kissed her again then walked out to the waiting Land Rover, then waved as he was driven away to start his tour of duty in a war torn land overseas.

Twenty weeks later, twenty long weeks of being apart, she was washing the lunch pots when there was a knock on the front door.  She rushed to open it and there stood Rob’s commanding officer, his wife and the Padre.  Her heart sank.  She knew why they were there, she had felt something during the night, a feeling of deep loss came to her, but she didn’t know why.  Now she knew why she had felt what she had.  Tracy had lost everything in her life.  Her best friend, her confidant, her lover and her husband.

The Army takes care of its own.  And Tracy was no exception.  Friends and neighbours gathered to support her in her time of need and when the time came for her to move out of the married quarter, they all helped her to make sure she didn’t have any problems.  At first, she moved in with her mother and father, but after a few months she found the courage to live on her own and found a small house in a quiet part of town.  She managed to find employment, so she boosted her Army widows’ pension.

Tracy put a small table under the living room window.  On this she placed a large framed photograph which had been taken at their wedding.  Rob did look handsome in his dress uniform.  She positioned it so that she could see it from anywhere in the room.  She placed a smaller one of him on her dressing table upstairs.

She didn’t think much of it at first, that she had caught the picture when she had opened the curtains in the morning, but every day she had to put the picture back into the correct position.  She knew that it wasn’t by much, but the picture would move during the night.  It wasn’t until she came downstairs one Sunday morning and found that the picture had been completely turned round, and was facing the window, that she started to worry.

“Who’s doing this?”  She called, “leave me alone!”

Tracy curled up on the settee, to watch a film on the television that afternoon and started to doze off.  As she dozed, she heard Rob’s voice in her head; she heard him saying his final words to her just before leaving.

“I’ll always love you and take care of you.”  She smiled, then got up and went into the kitchen for a drink.  That evening she went to bed early.  Her father was coming at half past six, as they were all going on holiday together.

Something woke her in the early hours, a noise from downstairs.  She was wide awake and listened.  There it was again.  Tracy got out of bed, as quietly as she could, and pulled her dressing gown on then left the bedroom and went to the top of the stairs, as she rang the police.  There was a light moving around in the living room.

Suddenly a shadow appeared at the bottom of the stairs and started to move up.

“You alone are yer?” it said moving up the stairs, “hey Shag we can ‘ave some fun ‘ere.  There’s a bit o’ stuff up ‘ere and she looks ripe for the plucking.  Come on, if you ‘old ‘er down you can ‘ave seconds.”  Tracy backed into the bedroom and as far from the door as she could. 

The hooded youth appeared silhouetted in the doorway.  He was rubbing the crotch of his ill-fitting baggy jeans and licking his lips.

“Come on Shag!” he called.

Tracy knew that it was pointless shouting or screaming because the neighbour to the left was an old man who was as deaf as a post, and the neighbours on the other side were at their villa in Spain, where they would be for another three months.  She was on her own and her mind was a blur of thoughts about what she could or should do now.

She heard a noise on the stairs.

“Come on Shag you shit, hurry up!  You can ‘ave the tart first if yer want.”

There was a thump and a noise like someone having the breath knocked out of them, and then more thumping and banging.

“Well, if yer don’t want ‘er them I’ll ‘ave ‘er me self.” He said.  Suddenly the door hit him, “hey!”  The door hit him again.  “What the!”  He moved out of the doorway and stood in front of the wardrobe. 

“Now then you bitch!  Are you going to be nice and quiet or do I ‘ave to get rough with you?”

Tracy's eyes opened wide on seeing the large suitcase, which was full of Rob’s clothes, and kept on top of the wardrobe, moving.  It suddenly moved off the wardrobe and then dropped onto the intruders’ head.  He collapsed to the floor.

Tracy sat on the bed and put her head into her hands and sobbed.  In the distance she could just make out the noise of police sirens.  Then she felt someone taking her right hand and hold it tenderly.  She looked up and felt a gentle kiss on her right cheek and Rob’s words came into her head, “I will always love you and be there to take care of you.”